Appreciate Your Small Breasts

Large breasts are a lot of trouble

Art by Geralt/Pixabay

Most women want large breasts. Why? Most men want women with large breasts.

Men, we forgive you. It’s a curse. Blame it on Adam and Eve. After God caught Adam eating the apple in the garden of Eden, he said, “Adam, thou shalt lust after large-breasted women to the end of your days.” Give them some slack, ladies, but don’t measure your self worth by what men think of your breasts.

Be Careful What You Wish For

Like all adolescent girls, I wanted large breasts. However, I was tall and skinny as a rail with B cups. How I long to return these D cups for those days. Here’s why you don’t want large breasts, ladies:

  • They are only attractive for 15 minutes when you’re 16 years old.
  • After you have children, they sag to your ankles.
  • Men like perky breasts; not sagging breasts
  • Your bra straps dig into your shoulders, leaving permanent indentations.
  • Men talk to your boobs, not your face.
  • Some women suffer from life-long back pain due to their large breasts.
  • You can’t go braless during the summer without looking obscene.
  • If you do go braless, you get all sweaty under your boobs.
  • All the adorable, sexy bras are made for small breasts.

Men Beware

Shortly before my mother died at the age of 94, she confided in me that my father said he married her because she had large breasts. Please take my word for it; he paid for that. My mother was mentally ill and made everyone’s life miserable. Men, be careful what you wish for, too.

Men are Strange

My brother, Michael, is five years younger than me. He and I are very close. He confides in me as if I were one of the guys. Michael dated a woman several years ago who, in his words, had enormous boobs. According to him, she had put on one too many pounds. He insisted that if she lost the weight, she’d still have enormous boobs. Michael bragged about her to his buddies at work. One day, he confessed he was getting tired of big breasts, and it would be nice to see some small ones for a change.

After he dated her for a short time, he met another woman, fell madly in love, and got married. Guess what? She had small breasts. I’ll call her Jane. Jane soon started saying she wanted to get breast implants. Michael didn’t want her to.

One day, he told me that she had an obsession with getting implants. I asked him why he didn’t want her to get them.

“I don’t believe in surgery that isn’t necessary,” he said.

“Men do this to women,” I replied.

He didn’t comment, which tells me he knew I was right.

And men say they don’t understand women.

Love Your Small Breasts

There are many reasons to love your small breasts:

  • You can get away with going braless with a tank top.
  • You can wear a plunging neckline without looking obscene.
  • Men talk to your face instead of your boobs.
  • All the cute sexy bras are made for you.
  • Your breasts will never sag to your ankles.
  • You’ll never sweat under your boobs.
  • Most men don’t have big penises, so you don’t need to feel bad about your small breasts.

Friend Envy

I envy my friend, Laura; she has small breasts. When she was an adolescent, she asked her doctor why her breasts weren’t getting big like her friend, Mary’s. The doctor told her that she had an athletic build, and they wouldn’t. But, she added, someday you’ll appreciate your small breasts. Laura is 75 now, and she threw out her bras several years ago. She can go braless without looking obscene.

Breast Implants

If you’re thinking about getting breast implants, please educate yourself on the health risks and make sure you go to a competent plastic surgeon who’s fully licensed. Talk to women who have used that doctor. Check the better business bureau to see if there are any complaints or lawsuits against that doctor.

A free spirit, visual artist, writer, animal lover, introvert and independent woman.

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