My heart goes out to you. I had my first child at 19 and loved every minute of it, but we're all different. My mother couldn't handle motherhood at all. When I was 12 years old she told me to never get married and have children, it will ruin your life. I'm really concerned for your child as well as you. I hope you can get counseling. Your parents probably love that little boy so don't feel you're a burden on them.